Without acknowledging what she is needing him for…
Of all the people in his world that he could place on mute she could not fathom why she was continually blanked out.
Mouth invisible, heart discarded.
Sometimes it could be days, sometimes just hours but it was obvious that it was deliberate.
To him this was justified.
He didn’t have the desire/urge/time/energy.
Never taking a moment to stand where she had long since fallen.
She couldn’t understand.
But it was slowly breaking her down.
Pushing her to a point where she would become the nothing that he made her in his silences.
Flippant with his rationale.
Did she need to plead her case to be placed at the front of the queue?
At the drop of a hat.
“Call me back please”
Darkness passes over slowly.
Willing him to be different this time.
To see what she gives and want to give the same.
A response that cuts deeper than he possibly intends but now she struggles to hold her wound closed, trying to prevent too much of her from staining the white cotton sheets.
Because after it all, he still didn’t call.
Did he not see the silent plea, or did he choose to ignore simply.
Call waiting? her heart whispers.
Deciding what she wants to say before she has had the chance to utter a syllable.
He once said that he didn’t want to lose her but his actions contradict.
She feels herself falling into that grey lethargy.
Her heart and gut feel as though they know what he has to say before he says it.
She is patient nonetheless.