Escape

I just needed to get out
Panic set in quickly.
Embarrassment at your nonchalant response to my reliance and the resulting hurt struck harder than any physical blow you could have delivered in fact.
“Exactly” you spat.
Careless with your words but I now feel that this is intentional as it as gone on for far too long.
"I don't need you" sticks to each of your sentences regardless of the haphazard phrasing.
So now, everything that we worked so hard for has no meaning.
Chest puffed full as you are proud of your separating.
You see, none of this needed to be so hard but you won't stop running.
The knife keeps turning.
This apparent achievement of backward progression.
As if to rub salt into a wound that was already weeping.
Claustrophobia clawed at my soul as you kept speaking.
Fake.
That is all that remains.
The reality is, I am nothing.
Not woman, not friend.
Nothing.
I gave because you asked.
I just needed
To get
Out.
Believe it or not I contemplated escaping whilst you were still moving… for longer than I should have.
Everything was clouded by grief and pain and then… the shame.
I should have known better.
Should have walked away long before now.
Everything feels different to me but for you, it’s just one of those things.
Reason, season or lifetime…
Seasonal in your mind.

S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...