http://bit.ly/cm7YZo
Sampler 4
Download... enjoy...
Review coming soon...
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Jazz Verse Juke Box
Sooo... The other day I was fortunate enough to be asked to do a little set in the upstairs bar at Ronnie Scotts for an event called Jazz Verse Juke Box...
I really enjoyed using the extremely talented jazz band and had fun throwing random words at them and watching them create magic.
Now, I don't usually paste performance recordings of myself but today... I am...
Enjoy
Natxx
I really enjoyed using the extremely talented jazz band and had fun throwing random words at them and watching them create magic.
Now, I don't usually paste performance recordings of myself but today... I am...
Enjoy
Natxx
Monday, August 30, 2010
Phoenix wishes.
I am spent.
Too tired to continue spinning in irregular circles.
Life is as life does and it will be whatever is written in its destiny.
I shout welcome back to my morning epiphanies dealing me a much needed slice of reality.
Let me breathe easy.
Rest easy.
Sleep peacefully.
Premature maybe but soon, hopefully.
Wanting to shed the internal zombie and fly free.
Swallow bitter pills quickly.
Let me breathe easy.
Rest easy.
Sleep peacefully.
Premature maybe but soon, hopefully.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Too tired to continue spinning in irregular circles.
Life is as life does and it will be whatever is written in its destiny.
I shout welcome back to my morning epiphanies dealing me a much needed slice of reality.
Let me breathe easy.
Rest easy.
Sleep peacefully.
Premature maybe but soon, hopefully.
Wanting to shed the internal zombie and fly free.
Swallow bitter pills quickly.
Let me breathe easy.
Rest easy.
Sleep peacefully.
Premature maybe but soon, hopefully.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Right now
Eric Roberson Feat Algebra Blessett.
'Iluvu2much' belongs to me.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
'Iluvu2much' belongs to me.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Friday, August 27, 2010
I hate....
The bastard bus driver.
He just drove right past me.
I was standing a little bit back from the curb because there was a huge puddle, he slows down so that he doesn't splash me then just drove past...
Arghhhh... Now I'm gonna be late!
Frigging frick, frick!
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
He just drove right past me.
I was standing a little bit back from the curb because there was a huge puddle, he slows down so that he doesn't splash me then just drove past...
Arghhhh... Now I'm gonna be late!
Frigging frick, frick!
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Monday, August 23, 2010
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Flippin'...
First I wear them to Goodwood after 2 days of showers and get nothing but baking hot sunshine.
Then I leave out in them today while the rain is pooooouring down. Suddenly it stops and I'm wondering whether it actually did rain considering the streets are now dry as ever.
Cute maybe, purple definitely but I can't help wondering whether my wellies are cursed!!!
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Great Quotes #1
Stolen from the facebook page of Indigo Brown.... They are a serious singing/songwriting machine... check em out.
Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/indigobrownmusic
Twitter - https://twitter.com/loveindigobrown
Myspace - http://www.myspace.com/indigobrownmusic
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Tear drops and ecstasy
Today
I thought about wrapping my legs around the narrow part of your waist as my fingernails find the broadness of your back and shoulders.
I thought about staring deep into your eyes and hearing anything that your soul was trying to say to me.
I thought about quickened breath and brightly coloured stars.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things you gave to me.
Today
I thought about your chest pressed close enough for my heart beat to find pace with yours.
I thought about slow gentle kisses and the firmer kind with a bite on my bottom lip.
I thought about talking dirty and pulling my hair.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things you gave to me.
Today
I thought about that easy loss of control and sweat glistening on bodies.
I thought about fingers on ankles and hands stroking skin.
I thought about that moment we first really connected in that emotional/mental/sexual way.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things
You gave to
Me.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
I thought about wrapping my legs around the narrow part of your waist as my fingernails find the broadness of your back and shoulders.
I thought about staring deep into your eyes and hearing anything that your soul was trying to say to me.
I thought about quickened breath and brightly coloured stars.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things you gave to me.
Today
I thought about your chest pressed close enough for my heart beat to find pace with yours.
I thought about slow gentle kisses and the firmer kind with a bite on my bottom lip.
I thought about talking dirty and pulling my hair.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things you gave to me.
Today
I thought about that easy loss of control and sweat glistening on bodies.
I thought about fingers on ankles and hands stroking skin.
I thought about that moment we first really connected in that emotional/mental/sexual way.
Tear drops and ecstasy.
The things
You gave to
Me.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Maybe?
I am writing to start a conversation.
Don't want you to secretly read my words and go into to your own world.
Want you to talk to me.
To ask questions.
I want to create a spark in the back of your mind.
Want you to take time pondering these words of mine.
Maybe look at things a little differently.
Look deeper than just me
and find yourself
Maybe...
Don't want you to secretly read my words and go into to your own world.
Want you to talk to me.
To ask questions.
I want to create a spark in the back of your mind.
Want you to take time pondering these words of mine.
Maybe look at things a little differently.
Look deeper than just me
and find yourself
Maybe...
Monday, August 16, 2010
If you...
...enjoy my stuff, please have a read of my friends wordpress...
She makes me jealous of her words whilst I am falling in love with them...
http://softlyshespeaks.wordpress.com/
She makes me jealous of her words whilst I am falling in love with them...
http://softlyshespeaks.wordpress.com/
Lost Beauty
"I told you it would be beautiful" he said
She looked down at him and felt slight embarassed.
Stared him in the eye but was unable to read him properly.
Told him to "Stop talking" because she couldn't tell whether it was honesty or game play.
That? Well that was an age away.
Now, she just wanted to go back to a time when he thought anything she shared with him was beautiful. 
Saturday, August 14, 2010
No disrespect but...
... I am so thankful that I don't feel as though I need to wear a weave because, in truth, there are some atrocious calamities out there.
Of course I have bad hair days too but if it all falls down that badly I can either wash/wet it and start from scratch or pull it back in one without the fear of tracks or pre-ordained partings.
I am also thankful that I don't feel like I need to wear full make up every single day.
As with weave that shit is expensive, rain or excessive moisture becomes life threatening and everyone can see it isn't real.
Plus, sometimes, when you mix the make up/weave combo t heavily you can wind up looking like a dude.
Just a random thought that occurred to me as I'm stood here outside Marble arch station.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Of course I have bad hair days too but if it all falls down that badly I can either wash/wet it and start from scratch or pull it back in one without the fear of tracks or pre-ordained partings.
I am also thankful that I don't feel like I need to wear full make up every single day.
As with weave that shit is expensive, rain or excessive moisture becomes life threatening and everyone can see it isn't real.
Plus, sometimes, when you mix the make up/weave combo t heavily you can wind up looking like a dude.
Just a random thought that occurred to me as I'm stood here outside Marble arch station.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Friday, August 13, 2010
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Random.
Today.
I got my first look at my newest nephew/niece.
It's always a humbling experience.
God does some amazing amazing things.
He always finds a way to help me put things into perspective.
I Love my family.
And I wish you all the best.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
I got my first look at my newest nephew/niece.
It's always a humbling experience.
God does some amazing amazing things.
He always finds a way to help me put things into perspective.
I Love my family.
And I wish you all the best.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Back gate
He held her and she held back tears.
Struggling to look him in the eyes whilst he, for once, sought hers hungrily.
She shared with him but was unsure whether he was really hearing.
Uncertain about everything.
A hurtful position to be in.
She asked him what he wanted and he said nothing... always nothing.
Well, he was in luck as that was all she now had left to give.
She walked away, head low, afraid to turn around for she knew he wouldn't be looking back, just walking away.
China tea set memories on a grey summers day.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Struggling to look him in the eyes whilst he, for once, sought hers hungrily.
She shared with him but was unsure whether he was really hearing.
Uncertain about everything.
A hurtful position to be in.
She asked him what he wanted and he said nothing... always nothing.
Well, he was in luck as that was all she now had left to give.
She walked away, head low, afraid to turn around for she knew he wouldn't be looking back, just walking away.
China tea set memories on a grey summers day.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Talk to em
I was at Chill Pill on tuesday ( a night hosted by Deanna Rodger and Raymond Antrobus) and managed to catch a brief 5mins with Kat Francois.
Somehow, our conversation went to babies... oh wait... lemme see if I can remember the path
Me looking tired -> Me working hard -> starting our own businesses -> Kat thinking about personal training -> some blank space I cannot remember and then BABIES.
She asked me how old I was (I think she was a little shocked) then she told me that I needed to start talking to my Ovaries.
She said that being 6yrs older than me, she does it all the time "It's alright my loves, I haven't forgotten about you" "I'm coming for you soon". Just to keep them warm for when she decides to have children.
Our conversation then moved onto a topic that we definitely tend to share similar views on...
The female poet and her singledom.
Ever noticed how male poets always have that faithful girlfriend/wife that follows and supports their journey, who will sacrifice, support and stroke the ego?
Ever noticed how the female poet has none of the above?
Hmmm... Maybe I better start whispering sweet nothings to my Ovaries... just in case.
Somehow, our conversation went to babies... oh wait... lemme see if I can remember the path
Me looking tired -> Me working hard -> starting our own businesses -> Kat thinking about personal training -> some blank space I cannot remember and then BABIES.
She asked me how old I was (I think she was a little shocked) then she told me that I needed to start talking to my Ovaries.
She said that being 6yrs older than me, she does it all the time "It's alright my loves, I haven't forgotten about you" "I'm coming for you soon". Just to keep them warm for when she decides to have children.
Our conversation then moved onto a topic that we definitely tend to share similar views on...
The female poet and her singledom.
Ever noticed how male poets always have that faithful girlfriend/wife that follows and supports their journey, who will sacrifice, support and stroke the ego?
Ever noticed how the female poet has none of the above?
Hmmm... Maybe I better start whispering sweet nothings to my Ovaries... just in case.
Day 2 & 3 and a little bit of 4
Ok... So I am gonna do a 2 (kinda 3) day catch up in one...
We all know I'm a rambler but I will try and keep it short.
So...
AW10 Party shoot
The search for the location for the AW10 shoot isn't coming along so well... LOL... I am definitely out of my comfort zone but am soldiering on none the less. I sent over my first load of "ideas" and was given the gentle let down, It was a good start but too obvious... I will take it with a pinch of sugar and try and think outside of the box.
I have come up with a second lot of ideas (one of which is an old RED light house and the other is the Serpentine Pavilion... long shot maybe but hey... you never know if you don't ask) that I am going to send over today and see what becomes of it.
Any idea's or suggestion... please, please, please send em my way.
I'm looking for outdoorsy type spaces. My only brief was that a train/bus or tube might be good... or even a fire engine... vintage would be better and RED would be amazing.
Copy for the Facebook comp
This task is going a little bit better. After sending over my first suggestion which was a limerick I was advised that it was a little bit, shall we say, complicated. So, after sending over an addition 4, we are down to a single "rhymy thing" but, after a meeting with legal this morning I just have to tweak a little so that it falls in line with all things law-abiding.
The prizes in the competition include, at least 1 pair of shoes, at least 1 bag (leather I believe) some hosiery and possibly swimwear (all these things are, of course, subject to availability).
I will keep anyone who actually reads my blog posted on comp details so that you can enter.
I have also had a new task added to my list, the help come up with a name for the Red or Dead fragrance that is soon to come out... Apparently they have been looking for a the perfect name for a few months now (no pressure there ay?). It comes in a really pretty birdcage bottle that sits on a little (working) swing.
Anyways... I should stop typing before my update becomes an essay...
So... until tomorrow.
Natxx
We all know I'm a rambler but I will try and keep it short.
So...
AW10 Party shoot
The search for the location for the AW10 shoot isn't coming along so well... LOL... I am definitely out of my comfort zone but am soldiering on none the less. I sent over my first load of "ideas" and was given the gentle let down, It was a good start but too obvious... I will take it with a pinch of sugar and try and think outside of the box.
I have come up with a second lot of ideas (one of which is an old RED light house and the other is the Serpentine Pavilion... long shot maybe but hey... you never know if you don't ask) that I am going to send over today and see what becomes of it.
Any idea's or suggestion... please, please, please send em my way.
I'm looking for outdoorsy type spaces. My only brief was that a train/bus or tube might be good... or even a fire engine... vintage would be better and RED would be amazing.
Copy for the Facebook comp
This task is going a little bit better. After sending over my first suggestion which was a limerick I was advised that it was a little bit, shall we say, complicated. So, after sending over an addition 4, we are down to a single "rhymy thing" but, after a meeting with legal this morning I just have to tweak a little so that it falls in line with all things law-abiding.
The prizes in the competition include, at least 1 pair of shoes, at least 1 bag (leather I believe) some hosiery and possibly swimwear (all these things are, of course, subject to availability).
I will keep anyone who actually reads my blog posted on comp details so that you can enter.
I have also had a new task added to my list, the help come up with a name for the Red or Dead fragrance that is soon to come out... Apparently they have been looking for a the perfect name for a few months now (no pressure there ay?). It comes in a really pretty birdcage bottle that sits on a little (working) swing.
Anyways... I should stop typing before my update becomes an essay...
So... until tomorrow.
Natxx
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Truth blind?
I think that maybe, in some place I am unable to fully see I am a horrible person.
I have spent days obsessing over it. At night I stare up at the black, cobwebbed recesses of my void and will the truth to project on a still back drop.
Maybe each time I open my mouth what I am trying to say is distorted or maybe my eyes appear dark and untrustworthy.
Maybe the muggy fingerprints of my soul leave a stain each time they try and touch you.
Maybe I am the opposite of everything that I think I am.
I mean...
Why else would everything that I seem to say automatically turn into poison?
Why else would I be tarred with 'negative' each time that I try and connect with you?
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
I have spent days obsessing over it. At night I stare up at the black, cobwebbed recesses of my void and will the truth to project on a still back drop.
Maybe each time I open my mouth what I am trying to say is distorted or maybe my eyes appear dark and untrustworthy.
Maybe the muggy fingerprints of my soul leave a stain each time they try and touch you.
Maybe I am the opposite of everything that I think I am.
I mean...
Why else would everything that I seem to say automatically turn into poison?
Why else would I be tarred with 'negative' each time that I try and connect with you?
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Day 1
Last night was a bit of a hard one so I am blogging a day behind... Hopefully I will catch up tonight.
Yesterday was a different kinda day.
Started off by sitting on the team meeting with the RoD President and her 3 creatives.
After discussing the teams whereabouts for the next couple of weeks and catching up on all things Red or Dead I was given a task or 2.
Task 1 - Source a vintage fire engine, train or fire station (something red and vintage) for an AW10 photoshoot...
Task 2 - Write up a short poem/rhymy thing (gotta love creatives) for a facebook competition that is being run via the More Magazine page, to win a hamper full of goodies.
Still waiting for feedback on the rhymy thing and am making calls re the shoot... all cool stuff... all new stuff.
Oh...The most amazing pair of boots also came in yesterday... I think I want them... you can't see it from the image but the lining is a lovely bright purple...
Yesterday was a different kinda day.
Started off by sitting on the team meeting with the RoD President and her 3 creatives.
After discussing the teams whereabouts for the next couple of weeks and catching up on all things Red or Dead I was given a task or 2.
Task 1 - Source a vintage fire engine, train or fire station (something red and vintage) for an AW10 photoshoot...
Task 2 - Write up a short poem/rhymy thing (gotta love creatives) for a facebook competition that is being run via the More Magazine page, to win a hamper full of goodies.
Still waiting for feedback on the rhymy thing and am making calls re the shoot... all cool stuff... all new stuff.
Oh...The most amazing pair of boots also came in yesterday... I think I want them... you can't see it from the image but the lining is a lovely bright purple...
Helena in Tan (also come in black)
They are available to buy from Schuh http://www.schuh.co.uk/red-or-dead/womens-tan-red-or-dead-helena/1473326220
So... Day 1 under the belt ... lets see what day 2 brings.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Some unexpected emotional shit...
My heart still tightens when memories are recalled.
Already questioned what you felt.thought.saw.
Sore.
My fault.
A mistake I will not repeat.
I had no words, no desire to eat, tired but have forgotten how to sleep.
Unsure why you showed me and then rejected me.
But
It isn’t about the humiliation.
It is simply this
“If not me then it will be she”
Soon enough, as I am used to seeing history repeat.
A burned deck of cards, charred beyond recognition.
I blacked in and out of you and now the chapter's closed and our black board is void of the colourful chalk that was once left on its easel for our free use.
Confused.
My world is filled with silence and I wander around knowing what is it to be a deaf mute.
A pain that will remain and continue to stain
Just about
Everything
No turning back now and no more misunderstandings as you made it clear to me.
Crystal.
Unable to look you in the eye.
Shame faced I wish to disappear into the faceless throng.
I am sorry for putting you in this position for this long.
Sorry for forcing you to dance to the same repetitive, dreaded song.
I get it...
If I hadn't before this point, I am now in complete understanding.
Already questioned what you felt.thought.saw.
Sore.
My fault.
A mistake I will not repeat.
I had no words, no desire to eat, tired but have forgotten how to sleep.
Unsure why you showed me and then rejected me.
But
It isn’t about the humiliation.
It is simply this
“If not me then it will be she”
Soon enough, as I am used to seeing history repeat.
A burned deck of cards, charred beyond recognition.
I blacked in and out of you and now the chapter's closed and our black board is void of the colourful chalk that was once left on its easel for our free use.
Confused.
My world is filled with silence and I wander around knowing what is it to be a deaf mute.
A pain that will remain and continue to stain
Just about
Everything
No turning back now and no more misunderstandings as you made it clear to me.
Crystal.
Unable to look you in the eye.
Shame faced I wish to disappear into the faceless throng.
I am sorry for putting you in this position for this long.
Sorry for forcing you to dance to the same repetitive, dreaded song.
I get it...
If I hadn't before this point, I am now in complete understanding.
The sponge
So...
Today, I start my 2 (possibly 3) week stint at 
I will be assisting the brand President in the hopes of gaining as much knowledge as possible.
I'm gonna take a break from the emotional shit and instead blog about my journey. It's only 12.45pm and I already have some interesting things to get my teeth into....
Wish me luck.
xxx
Wish me luck.
xxx
Friday, August 6, 2010
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
All I need...
Is some Cherry coke and a back rub...
Do that for me and I'll Love you forever...
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Do that for me and I'll Love you forever...
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
Monday, August 2, 2010
...
Soul begins to detach.
I will do it by myself.
Trust gone.
Belief gone.
No more safe zone.
Warm embrace now feels cold, empty.
A void.
Numb.
Gone.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
I will do it by myself.
Trust gone.
Belief gone.
No more safe zone.
Warm embrace now feels cold, empty.
A void.
Numb.
Gone.
S.O.A.P® Blogging on the go...
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